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Asking the Hard Questions

This is the essence of intuitive heuristics: when faced with a difficult question, we often answer an easier one instead, usually without noticing the substitution. (Location 204)

Its difficult to ask the right question, since the hard questions are usually uncomfortable. We lob conversational softballs out of fear that a fast pitch down the middle could backfire.

When you apply this troubleshooting method to your own behavior, you’ll find that it stops you from blaming yourself. Let’s say you don’t meditate in the mornings as you’d hoped. Instead of blaming yourself for a lack of willpower or motivation, walk yourself through the steps: Did you have something to prompt you? What is making this hard to do? (Location 579)

If you want a habit to stick, give yourself an easier ask.